they dont even sell garages at garage sales
every year after you turn 17 you get further away from being the age of the dancing queen and that’s my least favorite thing about growing up
ah but when you turn 34 you’re two dancing queens and thus having twice the time of your life. and at 51 you become the dancing triumvirate and three golden crowns are forged in your honor
lots to look forward to
i hate when people take other people’s glasses and are like ‘you have horrible vision’ like do you take wheelchairs from people and go ‘wow you have shitty legs’
Promoing at the beach
Ancient Roman prostitutes did something similar, but usually they would have phalluses inscribed in their sandals. So, if you were ever in the mood, you could just look down and follow the dicks.
follow the yellow dick-road
I love history lessons on tumblr.
howdy y’all sweet iced tea hook em horns remember the alamo
My math teacher called me average.
life hack: make out with me
Sorry not sorry
Edit: I’ve added a watermark to this just in case
I really should’ve done this in the first place gdi
Why are they called palm trees when they wont even fit in my hand
S.H.I.E.L.D.’s public relations department decides to take nice photos of the Avengers so that they can send them to the media whenever the team goes public. They somehow manage to convince Thor to put on normal clothes and get through the photoshoots pretty quickly.
Except Tony wouldn’t stop preening and duck facing. They eventually gave up and used the “best” one. To this day, Tony still gets the stink eye from the head of PR.
I also accept this headcanon